What Schemas Are?

Most of us walk through life believing we see reality clearly.

But in psychological terms, we are looking through our own set of lenses. In schema therapy, we call these lenses schemas.

Schemas are deeply held patterns of belief about ourselves, others and the world. They are not random thoughts. They are emotional-cognitive templates formed early in life — often in response to unmet needs, repeated experiences, or relational environments.

A child who repeatedly experiences criticism may develop a lens of “I am not good enough.”

A child who experiences unpredictability may develop a lens of “I am not safe.”

A child who feels unseen may carry “I don’t matter.”

These lenses were once adaptive. They helped us make sense of our environment. They helped us survive. But over time, they can become rigid.

Through an uneven lens, neutral feedback can feel like rejection.

A delayed reply can feel like abandonment.

Success can feel undeserved.

The world hasn’t necessarily changed — but the lens colours what we see.

Schemas influence how we interpret situations, who we choose in relationships, how we respond to conflict, and what we expect from ourselves.

The work in therapy is not about “blaming the past.” It is about recognising the lens — and gradually learning that we can adjust it. Because when the lens becomes more balanced, reality often looks different.